Joanne Chan

Joanne Chan
22 years of age
positivity, kindness and courage lead to great things
female. australian born chinese. UNSW. planning
exercise, food, badminton, lazing around is my fave hobbies
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things that linger
Thursday, 9 May 2013 | 0 comments
there are certain things that often linger in my thoughts. I'm not too sure whether people know, but if you're a really ignorant, judgemental person then i suggest you press the x on the right corner now :).
Had a random chat with coworker today about low self esteem. I was telling her that she may not see it but i'm one of those types of people that have a really low self esteem.. A few years ago, it was so low, i always thought to myself what's the point of my existence.
It's all about teenage girls and their little image issues.
Sometimes we over think, and drive our little brains crazy.
i really despised the mirror, hating what had looked right back at me. I'm still on the track of appreciating myself, because in the end, what doesn't kill you honestly does make you stronger. I'm still struggling, but i know one day, it'll be over.
I put myself down constantly so much, along with other people's criticisms of me, my brain actually started believing all the hurtful things would say.
I'd take these things to heart, but laugh it off in front of them.
I know it may seem silly to take it to heart, but it was an automatic feeling.
I didn't really stand up for myself.
I let people drown me in their criticisms. believing the negativity that they brought upon my little, naive brain.
What was worse was i never gave myself a chance. Consistently i'd take these things to heart, go back into my room, shut the door and cry. I hated the way i looked so much.. It was crazy.
These days,
i just want to love myself more..i want to give myself time, personal time to enjoy who i am, work and grow myself into a better person, both inside and out.
However, at the end of the day, I'd rather my inner being to be beautiful.
I hope one day i can make this happen.